As you may know, I am one to ramble and I’m sure this post will meet those expectations.
Today I had some very happy post, in the form of some more replica packs of things from WWII (okay, that probably could’ve been simplified, but we’re going with it). I had been waiting all morning for this and when they arrived I was very excited to have a look through all the items. I will probably examine them properly at a later date, as today I’ve not really been able to concentrate on reading.
I then came to a problem. I had no one (or at least it felt like it), to share my excitement with. My parents, I’m sure, were happy to see me so animated about my favourite subject. Yes, I have a friend who I can discuss 40s matters with, which is lovely and I’m grateful for. But I feel so self-conscious, of being too happy with it. It’s not a surprise to me, I always feel that I can’t be too happy about things, it’s just the way I am. But I felt a little isolated that I couldn’t share the feeling of pure happiness I get. It makes me feel closer to my great-grandparents, who I’ve blogged about. A generation that, in my view, were raised so well.
Sometimes, it feels to me, that my generation are a little uneducated about things that happened that ended up shaping the country, the world. It infuriates me a little (a lot) that they don’t take the time to learn about it. I certainly can’t force my views on people (although I do try to drop it into conversations without people noticing. It’s pretty blatant, so maybe I need to work on my subtlety), but I do wish people could at least appreciate it more openly.
I feel a little lost on some days, like today. Maybe it’s because of what I surround myself with (seriously, my room is filled with factual posters about war and motivational propaganda for women) or maybe it’s because my brain can’t understand things properly. All I know is I want to share my joy for an era I love, but I’m too scared to do it, in case someone will judge me for it. I know I over think things, trust me I do. But I do feel a little uncomfortable putting myself out there. When I do it I’m fine, but I just need that extra little kick of confidence to be able to do it properly.
Well, I think that’s all I need to say. I have no idea if that made any sense and I’ll worry about what people think of this post, but hey. Gotta push through it and enjoy what I love. Life’s too short to be worrying about it.
I’ll see you soon with a very exciting post. I’m so happy with it and I can’t wait to share it with you. Expect it sometime this week (if my eyes decide to stop going wobbly, that is).
See you soon!